How to Heal: Releasing Suppressed Emotions

Last September I already wrote about suppressing emotions. You can find those two blogs here.

I am writing about them again because these little suckers seem to be at the core of healing. There are lots of reasons why we don’t want to heal. One reason I haven’t written about is that healing requires us to acknowledge and honor our feelings. So basic, and yet we humans don’t do this well. In fairness, we likely haven’t been taught how.  

I don’t know about you, but growing up, there was no time to “explore feelings.” That wasn’t a thing for us. We were too busy figuring out the next problem that needed to be solved.  

Now, my niece and nephew are having a different experience. At 2 and 4, they know their emotions better than the average adult. We have knowledge, skills, and resources that weren’t available back then.

Ignoring our emotions is no longer an option. Emotions are insights coming to the surface. If we ignore them, we are essentially abandoning ourselves.

We will always have to heal from something, but we can experience a little more ease in life if we allow ourselves to feel the feelings before jumping to a solution or the next appointment. Suppressed emotions compound, and before we know it, we are a big ball of resentment, sadness, and anger that’s taking it out on whoever happens to be around. Bullying, ego-centric behavior, defensiveness, low self-esteem/confidence, and harm can all stem from the suppression of emotions. Your body can’t handle that level of stress. Before you know it, you are suffering from migraines, digestive issues, autoimmune disorders, chronic pain, a weakened immune system or fatigue, etc.  

To heal from suppressed emotions, raise your awareness of its impact on you, your body, your relationships, and your quality of life. This knowledge-building will be adequate motivation to do what comes next which is to: 

Feel the emotions all the way through.  

Let them expand until they burst out. Find safe ways to kick, scream, cry, and punch. Maybe this is screaming into a pillow, crying on a solo car ride, taking a kickboxing class, blowing up balloons and then popping them, going for a run, doing jumping jacks, dancing, or going to one of those “break rooms” where you can smash all the furniture. Allow the feelings to express fully. Yes, you can draw, journal, or chat with a trusted friend, but you also need a physical expression (aka release) of the emotion so it doesn’t get trapped. Give your body the permission to do what it needs to do.

It's the suppression of pain that keeps us in pain.

It’s the suppression of anger that keeps us in anger.

It’s the suppression of joy that makes it fleeting.

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