How to Heal From Impatience

I once heard that impatience was wanting more than you were willing to allow. I was personally offended. If I want something, of course, I would allow it! Riiiight?!

Maybe. Maybe not.

I learned to set a goal and get clear on why it mattered to me. I knew the why was just as important as the what, perhaps even more important. But, then I realized my sneaky subconscious had something else going on. While I was holding my deepest desires and wishes, I was also holding all the reasons I wouldn’t (or shouldn’t) get it. Damn. As it turns out, I wasn't always in a “state of allowing.” I want answers and solutions yesterday. For anyone into astrology, I have a sun sign in Aries—I’m ruled by Mars. I promise I am the epitome of impatience. Thank goodness for my Cancer, Gemini, and Taurus influences that help me chill the f*ck out.

Here's how you heal from impatience: presence.

Most people think patience is waiting around for something to happen, I know I did. I hear this sentiment from most of my clients too:

  • “But when will this change happen?”

  • “How can this happen faster?”

  • “What is taking so long?”

Re-frame this. Patience is not about passively waiting around. Patience is actually an active force, not a passive one. It's about establishing a strong presence with the emotions and thoughts of the moment and discovering how you are getting in your own way. Patience creates the space for you to do the work to release those blockages and bring all your energy to the present moment. Once this work is done, then, and only then, are we ready to receive.

Here are some examples of what I mean by ‘blockages:’

  • allowing limiting beliefs to keep you small, such as: “I’m not good enough” or “someone like me would never achieve that”

  • not establishing (and protecting!) healthy boundaries

  • not being open to credible feedback

  • an aversion to (perceived) conflict

  • keeping company and relationships that do not encourage or support you

Where will your presence be this week? This month? Today?

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